


you don't know how much i love you

by rareluvs



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Angst, Blood, Confessions, Crying, Death, M/M, Rejection, Soulmate AU, basically seungjin are friends but changbin thought they were more so yeah, hyunjin is mentioned like once, seungbin sweetie im so sorry, soulmate au involving color
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-19
Updated: 2018-11-19
Packaged: 2019-08-26 04:49:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16674817
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rareluvs/pseuds/rareluvs
Summary: soulmates meant different things to different people, changbin mused. for him, the word 'soulmate' meant that he would protect them...till the end.





	you don't know how much i love you

**Author's Note:**

> yeet so im back with angst! before you read this one, i strongly suggest that you put on cold by jorge méndez while reading since it goes hand in hand with this fic! anyways, um sorry in advance for this feel free to yell at me on my cc or twt @/woojilix :)))

changbin knew plenty about soulmates. he knew what was supposed to happen when you met them, how it was supposed to feel, how you would feel a lightness when they said ‘i love you’ for the first time. how the world would be start to regain the color that it had been keeping away from you.

  


but kim seungmin wasn’t what he was expecting.

  


he denied that they were soulmates, refusing to acknowledge that he in fact, had seen the world in color for the first time when he had met changbin at age 7.

  


_‘but that’s okay’_ he told himself.

  


changbin was happy to have him as a best friend, seeing to it that he spent the years fondly instead of being bitter.

  


he saw everything in beautiful coloring when he was with seungmin.

  


-

  


“changbin, stop following me!” seungmin huffed, pressing his cold hands further into his uniform pockets, but changbin just kept walking to match the brunette’s fast paced footsteps.

  


“you know it’s not safe to walk alone over here, minnie.”

  


“i don’t care! i’m going to hyunjin’s anyway.”

  


changbin felt his heart sting a little bit. but he kept walking alongside him.

  


“min-”

  


there was a moment when seungmin turned to look him in the eyes, stopping their walk right in front of an alleyway that was connected to a few grocery stores.

 

“i don’t think we can be friends anymore, bin. i can’t..i can’t love you like that.” seungmin whispered, face red from shame and the cold. it was unfair, changbin felt, how the snowflakes fell almost daintily into seungmin’s brown hair and lashes behind his glasses, making him appear angelic. this whole situation was so fucking unfair.

 

if only he knew of seungmin lying through his teeth to spare the both of them from pain, maybe it would’ve been different.

 

before changbin could respond to seungmin rejection, his eyes caught a suspicious figure coming out of the alley and it didn’t seem like he was looking at anything else-

 

besides the two.

 

his face was covered, but the way he was holding something that looked dangerously similar to a gun, had changbin forcefully pushing seungmin a to the ground a good few feet away from behind him. he knew that this was a bad part of town, but seungmin had been so desperate for snacks that changbin had given into him once again, just to see him smile when he drank his hot chocolate.

 

the only thought in his mind now was to protect seungmin and get him the hell away from this damn place. to get him somewhere safe. to get him home, safe, to his parents who would probably be worried by the lack of their precious angel.

 

to protect his best friend, his love, his _soulmate._

 

_thud._

 

it happened so quickly even changbin had a hard time believing that it happened. but he fucking felt it.

 

from where changbin had fallen, it looked as if the stars were trying to come closer to him. to touch his finger tips, or perhaps to place themselves on his face. or maybe they were trying to come down and heal the bullet wound now lodged on his abdomen.

 

the man had ran away.

 

there was a thick, heavy, silence in the air for a fraction of a second.

 

that was until kim seungmin started to cry, his phone pressed up to his ear, shaking and painted dark red.

 

“help! somebody please! help him!” the brunette screamed into his phone to the paramedics, to _anyone_ who was listening, trying to stop the blood flowing out from the changbin’s stomach, but not wanting to get up and leave the other on the cold ground that was covered with a thin layer of ice.

 

the younger quickly realized the temperature around them, throwing off his jacket the best that he could with one hand, and used it as a support for changbin’s body, pulling his head onto his lap.

 

he laughed, which caused more blood to spill past his lips. at least his love hadn’t gotten hit. changbin knew that by taking this hit he would be surrendering any remaining chance of being together with seungmin, but he wouldn’t trade it for the world. he couldn’t let anything ever hurt seungmin. no matter how big or small.

 

“seungmin.” he breathed, sharp pain overtaking his senses. by now he had lost a very dangerous amount of blood, but he continued on.

 

“don’t die on me, please. please, bin, i’m sorry. i’m sorry for what i said, i take it back, i didn’t mean it. i didn’t mean any of it.” seungmin’s sobbing rang in his ears.

 

the sky started to shake in front of changbin’s brown eyes as he stared, tears filling his eyes, blood covering both the sides of his mouth and his chest where the bullet had entered him.

 

“seungmin, i love you so much.” he broke, coughing more frequently, feeling himself shake. he felt guilty that he would have to leave seungmin, but in the end, he had protected him, and that’s what mattered.

 

“stay awake, please. i love you, changbin.” by now, full body racking sobs had creeped into seungmin’s voice and changbin found himself blurting everything that he had left unsaid before it was too late.

 

“i love you more than you’ll ever know, minnie. i know this isn’t the best time but i wanted to let you know that i love you so much. i really do. everyday i think about how can i make you happy, and how i can protect the smile on your face that lights up a whole room. i’ve tried so hard to take all the pain away so that you wouldn’t have to worry about anything, but now...i don’t think i can do that anymore. i know you didn’t want to see me as your soulmate but i know in my heart that we’ll be together.” changbin gasped, the arm which held his arm dropping onto the concrete slab next to his face.

 

loud screams burst through the night, but changbin couldn’t hear anymore.

 

he was gone.

 

and seungmin saw the color disappear from the world.


End file.
